Use Bombs:  <script type="text/javascript" src="http://embed.technorati.com/embed/2h2gn8tih6.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript" src="http://www.use-bombs.com/wp-content/themes/usebombs5/BubbleTooltips.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript">window.onload=function(){enableTooltips("content-recommended")};</script>  <meta name="Description" content="When Things Get Nasty"> <meta name="Keywords" content="Use Bombs,Articles,Video,Skits,Music,Phots,Humor,Comedy,Arion,Arison,Josh,Dave,Brett,Londraville,Allen,Bova,Ramus,Northern New York,NY,"> <meta name="Copyright" content="Copyright 2005-2007 Arion Londraville, Arison Londraville, David Bova, Josh Allen, Brett Ramus, and the contributing authors."> <meta name="Author" content="Arion Londraville"> <meta name="Robots" content="all"> <meta name="ICBM" content="44.33675, -75.91800"> <meta name="DC.title" content="Use Bombs">  <link rel="Home" href="http://www.use-bombs.com/"> <link rel="Gallery" href="http://www.use-bombs.com/photos"> <link rel="Video" href="http://www.use-bombs.com/archives/category/site-video"> <link rel="Music" href="http://www.use-bombs.com/music"> <link rel="Projects" href="http://www.use-bombs.com/projects"> <link rel="Author" href="http://www.use-bombs.com/about"> <link rel="Copyright" href="http://www.use-bombs.com/copyright"> <link rel="icon" type="image/x-icon" href="/favicon.ico"> <link rel="alternate" type="application/rss+xml" title="RSS 2.0" href="http://www.use-bombs.com/feed/"> <link rel="alternate" type="text/xml" title="RSS .92" href="http://www.use-bombs.com/feed/rss/"> <link rel="alternate" type="application/atom+xml" title="Atom 0.3" href="http://www.use-bombs.com/feed/atom/">  <link rel="stylesheet" type="text/css" href="http://www.use-bombs.com/wp-content/themes/usebombs5/css/fonts.css"> <style type="text/css" media="Screen, Projection, Print">@import 'http://www.use-bombs.com/wp-content/themes/usebombs5/style.css';</style> <link rel="stylesheet" type="text/css" title="Site Default" href="basic.css" > <link rel="stylesheet" type="text/css" href="http://www.use-bombs.com/wp-content/themes/usebombs5/css/stylePrint.css" media="Print"> <link rel="stylesheet" type="text/css" media="handheld" href="http://www.use-bombs.com/wp-content/themes/usebombs5/css/styleHandheld.css" > <link rel="stylesheet" type="text/css" href="http://www.use-bombs.com/wp-content/themes/usebombs5/css/album.css">  </head> <body> <h1><a name="top" id="top"></a>Use-Bombs</h1> <div id="skip"><a href="#maincontent">Skip to Content</a></div> <div id="container"> <div class="sidebar"> <div class="branding-logo"> <img src="http://www.use-bombs.com/wp-content/themes/usebombs5/images/logo-1.gif" width="145px" height="52px" alt="Josh and Arion discuss the Use-Bombs logo."> </div> <div class="navigation"> <p id="homeLink"><a href="http://www.use-bombs.com" title="Where it All Begins... Again.">Home / Blog</a></p> </div> </div> <div class="content-head"> <div class="branding-tagline"> <p>...When Things Get Nasty</p> </div> <div class="navigation"> <ul> <li><a href="http://www.use-bombs.com/photos" title="Photos From the End of the Universe! (Dramatic Chord)">Gallery</a></li> <li><a href="http://www.use-bombs.com/archives/category/site-video/" title="It Killed the Radio Star!">Video</a></li> <li><a href="http://use-bombs.com/music" title="Zip Zop Zoopity Bop!">Music</a></li> <li><a href="http://use-bombs.com/projects" title="The Fun Never Ends!">Projects</a></li> <li id="lastLink"><a href="http://use-bombs.com/about" title="Everything a Person Needs to Stalk Us... !">About</a></li> </ul> </div> </div>  <div id="content"> <div id="content-extra">  <p class="navButton"><a href="http://www.use-bombs.com/archives/category/funny/" >Newer Posts »</a></p>  <form id="searchform" method="get" action="http://www.use-bombs.com/"> <div id="searchBox"> <input type="text" value="Search" name="s" id="s" /> <input type="submit" value="Go »" id="searchsubmit" /> </div> </form>  <div id="content-recommended"> <div class="content-extra-head"> <h2>Recommended</h2> <hr /> </div> <div class="content-extra-body"> <ul> <li><a href="http://www.little-gamers.com" rel="contact" title="Hot Swedish Love.">Little Gamers</a></li> <li><a href="http://www.supergnarly.com/" rel="friend met" title="Local super action music Kung Fu kick promoter–Also power forums!">SuperGnarly</a></li> <li><a href="http://www.sydlexia.com" rel="contact" title="Satirical articles discussing pop culture from the Bush-Reagan era.">Sydlexia</a></li> <li><a href="http://www.thebromance.com" rel="me" title="The Use Bombs and SuperGnarly podcast about local and independent bands.">The Bromance</a></li> <li><a href="http://windyharbor.wordpress.com/" rel="friend met" title="The web log of Kurt Hunt.">Windy Harbor</a></li> </ul> <div id="browserRant"> <p>Internet Explorer... <em>*tisk tisk*</em> <br />Maybe you need to <a href="http://www.cnet.com.au/software/internet/0,239029524,339271935,00.htm" title="cNet Compares Firefox 2.0 to IE7">read a comparison</a>? With IE's history, we would <em>strongly recommend</em> switching to Firefox (or <a href="http://www.opera.com/" title="Download the Opera web browser">Opera</a>!)</p> <script type="text/javascript"></script> <script type="text/javascript" src="http://pagead2.googlesyndication.com/pagead/show_ads.js"></script> </div> </div> </div>  <div id="content-subscribe"> <div class="content-extra-head"> <h2>Subscribe</h2> <hr /> </div> <div class="content-extra-body"> <ul id="subscribeList"> <li id="sub-1"><a href="http://fusion.google.com/add?feedurl=http%3A//www.use-bombs.com/feed">Google</a></li> <li id="sub-2"><a href="http://add.my.yahoo.com/content?url=http%3A//www.use-bombs.com/feed">My Yahoo!</a></li> <li id="sub-3"><a href="http://feeds.my.aol.com/add.jsp?url=http%3A//www.use-bombs.com/feed">My AOL</a></li> <li id="sub-4"><a href="http://my.msn.com/addtomymsn.armx?id=rss&ut=http://www.use-bombs.com/feed&ru=http://www.use-bombs.com">My MSN</a></li> <li id="sub-5"><a href="http://www.newsgator.com/ngs/subscriber/subext.aspx?url=http://www.use-bombs.com/feed">Newsgator</a></li> <li id="sub-6"><a href="http://www.bloglines.com/sub/http://www.use-bombs.com/feed">Bloglines</a></li> <li id="sub-7"><a href="http://www.use-bombs.com/feeds">RSS Feeds</a></li> </ul> </div> </div> </div>  <div class="content-news"> <a name="maincontent" id="maincontent"></a> <div class="post New From Use-Bombs Labs" > <div class="avatar Arion Londraville"> <h2><a href="http://www.use-bombs.com/archives/2007/01/use-bombs/new-from-use-bombs/">New From Use-Bombs Labs</a></h2> <p class="meta">Arion Londraville - Monday, 1st January 2007</p> <div class="img-right" style="width:130px;"><a href="http://www.use-bombs.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/01/bomb.jpg"><img id="image239" src="http://www.use-bombs.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/01/bomb.thumbnail.jpg" alt="The Dodedecotron 350XL in action." height="96" width="128" /></a> <p style="width:128px;">The Dodedecotron 350XL takes dedecorating to the extreme.</p> </div> <div class="img-right" style="width:130px;"><a href="http://www.use-bombs.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/01/nade.jpg"><img id="image238" src="http://www.use-bombs.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/01/nade.thumbnail.jpg" alt="The Dodedecotron 350" height="96" width="128" /></a> <p style="width:128px;">When it’s time to clean up, the Dodedecotron is on the job.</p> </div> <p>Ah, the holidays. A time of the year set aside for love, joy, and peace. A festive time of filled with lights and decoration. </p> <p>You’ve spent hours of effort creating Yule-time joy and crafting holiday cheer. Yet, as with anything, what goes up must come down. And, as we all know, taking those decorations down can be a lot of work.</p> <p>Now there’s a better way! Now there’s a way to dedecorate your home in minutes instead of weeks. Enter the <em>Dodedecotron 350</em> and it’s older sibling the <em>Dodedecotron 350XL</em>. Cleaning up after the holidays will never be the same again!</p> <p>Do you have gift wrap on the floor? Garland hanging from the ceiling? Lights strung up across to the roof? A mother-in-law visiting for the season? Pesky raccoons living in the garbage? Nothing is outside the realm of spotlessness created by the Dodedecotron 350’s awesome explosive wrath.</p> <p>With simple patented Pull N’ Throw™ technology, the Dodedecotron eliminates the need for soaking, scrubbing, bubbling, sanitizing, and cannibalizing. This Saves you time, energy, and money!</p> <p>And, the Dodedecotron can make you the hero of your neighborhood! As a matter of fact, using the 45 kiloton Dodedecotron 350XL a single person—with a team of six dedicated explosive and Dodedecotron specialists—could theoretically dedecorate several square miles at a time.</p> <p>Am I not convincing enough? Users love the Dodedecotron! Just listen to what they have to say about it.</p> <blockquote><p>“I listen to Paul Harvey News! When I heard that the Dodedecotron 350 could cut my dedecoration costs by up to 50%, I was so eager that I bought two!”<br /> —Steven Little, MO</p></blockquote> <blockquote><p>“The Dodedecotron is a life saver. Not only did it get rid of my Hanukkah decorations, but it creates a warm, healthy heat. That cuts down on my gas bill!”<br /> — Beverly Simpson, ON, Canada</p></blockquote> <blockquote><p>“I just ordered my first Dodedecotron. Honestly, I’m more excited about taking the decorations down this year than I am about putting them up.”<br /> —Jonathan Wright, 1978-2006</p></blockquote> <blockquote><p>“United States. Infidels. Dodedecotron—Always Fun.”<br /> —Mahmoud Ahmadinejad</p></blockquote> <p>Einstein said of the Dodedecotrons 350XL’s predecessor, “The release of atomic energy has not created a new problem. It has merely made more urgent the necessity of solving an existing one.” Einstein! <em>You don’t get much better than an Einstein quote!</em></p> <p>Stay tuned for important information about ordering your Dodedecotron or Dodedecotron 350XL.</p> <p><i>Use as directed. Use-Bombs is not responsible for any injury, maiming, disfigurement, or death caused by the Dodedecotron. Dodedecotron has been known to cause permanent damage or a painful hammock effect in some users. Dodedecotron 350XL has been known to cause nuclear winter when used improperly. Use of the Dodedecotron in your area may be disallowed by local laws or international treaties. Additional fees may apply for international orders.</i></p> New From Use-Bombs Labs <p class="postlink"><a href="http://www.use-bombs.com/archives/2007/01/use-bombs/new-from-use-bombs/#comments" title="Comment on New From Use-Bombs Labs">1 Comment »</a> | <a href="http://www.use-bombs.com/archives/2007/01/use-bombs/new-from-use-bombs/">Read Full Article: "New From Use-Bombs Labs"</a> </p> </div> </div> <div class="post For those who don’t know" > <div class="avatar Dave Bova"> <h2><a href="http://www.use-bombs.com/archives/2006/04/use-bombs/for-those-who-don%e2%80%99t-know/">For those who don’t know</a></h2> <p class="meta">Dave Bova - Wednesday, 26th April 2006</p> <p><strong>The Oreo has been America’s most successful cookie since 1912. Though, its history in our nation cannot be challenged, the proper method of Oreo consumption is often a heavily debated issue. Today, I’m going to inform you how to correctly eat an Oreo cookie.</strong></p> <ol> <div class="img-right"><a href="http://www.use-bombs.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/04/cookie.jpg"><img src="http://www.use-bombs.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/04/cookie.thumb.jpg" alt="Milk and Cookies"/></a> <p style="width: 150px;">Equal parts milk and air, please.</p> </div> <li style="padding-bottom:10px;"><b>Select an Oreo</b> The simple selection of your Oreo may be the most daunting step in the entire Oreo consumption process. The sheer variety incorporated into the Oreo family is mesmerizing to say the least. For starters, you have your standard Oreo cookie. It’s not flashy, but it will definitely get the job done. Should you be looking for something with some more substance, you can check into Double Stuf Oreo, which comes in several variations, but essentially has a doubled portion of the classic Oreo filling. Other Oreo variations include: Chocolate Cream Oreo, Holiday Cream Oreo, Fudge Oreo, White Fudge Oreo, Mystic Mint Oreo, Uh-Oh! Oreo, Double Delight Oreo, Golden Oreo, Mini Oreo, Oreo pudding and a plethora of others. Choose wisely, this isn’t as simple as A or B.</li> <li style="padding-bottom:10px;"><b>Prepare your milk</b> Get a nice tall glass of your favorite moo juice handy. You’ll probably want to check the expiration date first. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.</li> <li style="padding-bottom:10px;"><b>Assume the position and twist away -</b> Grab your Oreo with three fingers and the thumb of your dominant hand. Apply the same fingers of your opposite hand to the other side of the Oreo. In one fluid motion, spin your dominant hand counterclockwise while simultaneously snapping your opposite hand clockwise. To the delight of any onlookers, the Oreo will separate, revealing the sweet nectar of its creamy interior.</li> <li style="padding-bottom:10px;"><b>Get the creamy goodness inside you!</b> Next, you will bring each side of the Oreo cookie to your mouth, cream first. (Not all at once!) With your tongue, and perhaps a drag of the teeth for good measure, make sure the cream from the interior of the Oreo becomes the ex-cream from the interior of the Oreo.</li> <div class="img-right"><a href="http://www.use-bombs.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/04/cookie2.jpg"><img src="http://www.use-bombs.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/04/cookie2.thumb.jpg" alt="Milk and Cookies"/></a> <p>Wallow in Oreo delight.</p> </div> <li style="padding-bottom:10px;"><b>Damage control</b> Now it’s time to perform some quick surgery on your cream-ridden Oreo. Imagine you’re a crack surgeon on an emergency room drama and your patient is chocolate and flat-lining. Press both sides of the Oreo cookie back together as if nothing you did in step four ever happened.</li> <li style="padding-bottom:10px;"><b>The Slam Dunk</b> Now the process begins to approach its climax. Take your digitally restored Oreo, and with the firmest of the firm grips, dip your Oreo cookie into your prepared glass of milk. It is as if the Oreo was lost in a desert and just stumbled into a milky oasis.</li> <li style="padding-bottom:10px;"><b>Consume and repeat</b> Bring the milky Oreo to your lips and consume it. You’ve just succeeded in your task. That’s all there is to it! Aren’t you glad you probably had to purchase more than one?</li> </ol> For those who don’t know <p class="postlink"><a href="http://www.use-bombs.com/archives/2006/04/use-bombs/for-those-who-don%e2%80%99t-know/#comments" title="Comment on For those who don’t know">4 Comments »</a> | <a href="http://www.use-bombs.com/archives/2006/04/use-bombs/for-those-who-don%e2%80%99t-know/">Read Full Article: "For those who don’t know"</a> </p> </div> </div>  <div id="siteinfo-legal"> <p><a href="http://www.use-bombs.com/archives/category/funny/" ></a> <a href="#top">Back to Top</a> <a href="http://www.use-bombs.com/archives/category/funny/" >Newer Posts »</a></p> <p>© Copyright 2005-2007 Arion Londraville, Arison Londraville, David Bova, Josh Allen, Brett Ramus.</p> </div> </div> </div> </div> <script src="http://www.google-analytics.com/urchin.js" type="text/javascript"></script> <script type="text/javascript">_uacct = "UA-251906-1"; urchinTracker();</script> </body> </html>